On yer Bike, Pal

 

As we watch the daily shenanigans in the Tory Party after the allegations of Number 10 being a party magnet and wait for Sue Gray, there is a sense that we may have A Very British Coup.  It will be the polar opposite of Chris Mullin's novel and subsequent TV series about the establishment taking out a Labour Prime Minister for seeking to deliver his manifesto. This time it will be for partying in Downing Street on numerous occasions whilst the rest of the nation suffered in lockdown. It is quite evident from all the opinion polls, the vox pops, and the internecine war in the Tory Party that parties are beyond the pale. 

Whilst it is easy to understand the public mood of anger at the PMs latest display of hubris, it has not come without warning and it would rank quite far down the scale of his worst failings. Consider Boris Johnson's lifetime achievements in breaching the norms of honesty, decency, fairness, responsibility and diplomacy.

As a Journalist, Johnson was adept at faking articles, making up myths and was sacked from the Times. At the Daily Telegraph, he reported from Brussels and became a leading Eurosceptic whilst inventing myths about over zealous regulations. As editor of the Spectator, he opposed the banning of handguns after the Dunblane massacre. He has recently admitted that he is Guilty about his-Journalism.  This doesn't absolve him from the misogynistic and racist comments that frequently adorned articles, such as “It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving piccaninnies.” There are dozens of similar quotes that led his editor at the Telegraph to pronounce him totally unsuitable for any office of State

As Mayor of London and Prime Minister, he has shown a total disregard for financial probity and tendency to reward supporters. His propensity to promote vanity projects such as a new airport on the Isle of Dogs, Garden Bridges over the Thames, a bridge to Northern Ireland, a new Royal Yacht have all come to grief but only after millions of £ had been wasted on feasibility studies. He overspent on new London buses, converting the Olympic stadium into a football stadium and wallpaper. Worst of all he approved £37bn to be spent on a Test and Trace programme that never worked but was managed by one of his friends. Other friends were poured into the House of Lords or given the chance to win massive contracts for PPE through a fast track. 

His habit of ditching family, friends, colleagues and his lack of concern for the common good has been manifest throughout his career. Without commenting on his family travails, his willingness to provide details of a News of the World colleague to enable a physical attack in 1990 suggests that his moral compass is uncalibrated. His dismissal of Tory MPs who didn't accept his position on Brexit was a measure of his oligarchical ambitions. By disposing of MPs like David Gauke, Rory Stewart, Justine Greening, Heidi Allen, Alistair Burt and Dominic Grieve, some of whom were pushed and others jumped, the Tory Party has lost its most honest advocates for social justice, human rights and ethical foreign policies. The new intake of Brexit loyalists are now realising that loyalty is a one-way ticket with Boris Johnson. Already one has switched to Labour and a dozen MPs have been blackmailed or threatened by the PM and his whips for failing to support controversial policies that adversely affect their constituencies or if they were likely to call for his resignation.

His tacit support of ex-President Trump, the appointment of ex Australian Prime Minister, Tony Abbott as a Trade Advisor, his relationship and ennoblement of Russian Oligarchs, his implicit involvement in the imprisonment of Nazanin Zaghari-Radcliffe and his failure to negotiate her release illustrate his support for populist regimes and abstinence from ethical foreign policies. Soft power opportunities for the UK have been sacrificed by the cuts to International Aid and his minimal engagement in the COP26 Climate Change conference that he supposedly hosted but with a social distance that he gleefully ignored when it came to Covid.

As one of the original eurosceptics and inventor of many fake defamation stories about the EU, it is no surprise that he has continued to show no inclination to collaborate with European leaders. The hard Brexit that he hustled through parliament has had a devastating impact on trade, inflation, UK businesses, Irish relations and travellers. As an entitled Eton and Oxford classical graduate, there is no sense of mea culpa, that sort of admission is for snowflakes or the woke tendency at the BBC. 

Lying is not parliamentary language and accusations of the Prime Minister being a liar is unparliamentary. But it has ever been the case as the article from Rory Stewart makes clear. “We should all have expected this. He’s been a very famous public figure for 30 years. The British public has spent 30 years focusing on the fact that he lies, that he is disorganised, that he betrays almost every personal commitment that he has." He has lied to Liverpool, to The Times newspaper, to the then Tory leader, Michael Howard, to the electorate on Brexit and much else, to the EU, to Lord Geidt and the Queen; so what makes anyone think he is not lying about Partygate. It is part of his DNA.

So, despite a lifetime of intended or unintended dire consequences from his time in public office, it will be the partying that seals the fate of our populist PM. A very British coup and after Sue Gray reports and the eventual realisation by Tory MPs that they will go down the tubes with him. His exit could be captured in the wirds of populist TV prorammes and his final chorus of 'Would I lie to you?'  will be 'Pointless', 'Big Brother' will hopefully evict him.

Under Offer, must pay well

Question Time for Britain

Andrew Windsor

Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson

Yesterday was a D-day for the UK. Boris Johnson was eviscerated by MPs, the press and the electorate over his addiction to half-truths and failure to observe any of the principles of good governance: selflessness, integrity, objectivity, accountability, openness, honesty and leadership.  Then the not-so-grand Duke of York was unfrocked and stripped of all royal privileges. Parliament and the monarchy, the two institutions that are the foundations of the UK constitution, have been found wanting.

Sympathy for Boris Johnson was noticeably lacking, apart from the oleaginous mumblings from weak-willed cabinet ministers who were sent out to stop the rot armed with just a few shibboleths which they repeated ad nauseam as they were ridiculed by journalists and commentators. Anyone watching the events of the last few weeks would come to the conclusion that we are led by a charlatan who has never had the temperament or gravitas, let alone the grasp of leadership to be elected to any level of governance. 

On Question Time from the safe Tory voting Shrewsbury, there was a wave of total anger and a near-unanimous belief that Johnson had no option but to resign. Even the former Daily Mail far-right columnist and Brexit worshipper, Isabel Oakeshott, called for the PM's resignation. The government stooge for the programme, the hesitant and rambling, Simon Hart, must have wished he had told the PM to find someone else to defend the indefensible as he struggled to respond to the overwhelming condemnation of the PM. It is time the cabinet and junior ministers started a 'why me?' movement.

The total unsuitability of Boris Johnson as PM is hardly news, even Max Hastings, the former Daily Telegraph editor and boss of Boris Johnson, wrote an article three years ago that has proved almost word-perfect in its predictions.

"There is room for debate about whether he is a scoundrel or mere rogue, but not much about his moral bankruptcy, rooted in a contempt for truth. His premiership will almost certainly reveal a contempt for rules, precedent, order and stability.

Dignity still matters in public office, and Johnson will never have it. Yet his graver vice is cowardice, reflected in a willingness to tell any audience, whatever he thinks most likely to please, heedless of the inevitability of its contradiction an hour later.

Like many showy personalities, he is of weak character. I recently suggested to a radio audience that he supposes himself to be Winston Churchill, while in reality being closer to Alan Partridge." I have a hunch that Johnson will come to regret securing the prize for which he has struggled so long because the experience of the premiership will lay bare his absolute unfitness for it."

My disdain for the man goes back to 2004 when he cycled past an outdoor cafe in London and was harangued by some of the clients for lying about an affair that had him sacked as a minister, he gave two fingers to the cafe. His performances on Have I Got News for You, were most notable for his bumbling incompetence but they gave him comedic notoriety. This was amplified during his stunts as Mayor of London like wafting about on zip wires and giving personal favours to friends. He wasted public money on iffy plans for airports and bridges as well as poor procurement of buses, bikes and water cannons.

It is very noticeable that the other political leaders in the UK: Keir Starmer, Ed Davey, Caroline Lucas, Nicola Sturgeon and Mark Drakeford have all displayed gravitas and followed the principles of good governance during the pandemic. They may lack the populist instincts of Boris Johnson but they have put in the hard yards and shown a willingness to listen to the evidence and advice that Johnson has persistently avoided or delayed taking.

Prince Andrew has a no less toxic presence in the elite echelons of our constitution. He displays many of the flaws that have made Boris Johnson such an implausible prime minister: entitlement, lack of empathy, selfishness, extravagance, and failure in his duties. They were not qualities that endeared him to his subjects nor was his obsession with titles, uniforms and playing golf. He is by some distance the least liked member of the Royal family according to those who have had the misfortune to have had dealings with him. Unlike the prime minister who was elected by his peers, Prince Andrew inherited his titles, gongs and wardrobe of uniforms. Unfortunately for him, the family decided his association with Epstein and Maxwell was damaging the monarchy so made it clear that when he was down, he was down. It is a lifetime achievement award.

The Tory party are being unusually slow to dismiss their man. They still have this belief, echoed by the press hacks, that he is an electoral asset after gaining an eighty-seat majority at the 2019 general election. This is a sad deception, it was achieved with only 29% of the electorate voting Conservative despite the dire performances and savage press attacks on both Jeremy Corbyn and Jo Swinson, Johnson's principal opponents. It was one of the lowest-ever percentage poll for the Tories but the first past the post electoral system gives strange results when there are multiple opposition parties. Theresa May also achieved 29% of electorate votes in the 2017 election but she was facing peak Corbyn in what was a two-party fight and barely obtained a majority of MPs. Perhaps the real reason the Tory MPs have not ditched Johnson is that in Rishi Sunak and Liz Truss, they would have to choose between the devil and the deep blue sea and they haven't figured out which is which yet. 

It is time for a written constitution, neither the Tory Party nor the House of Windsor should remain the custodians of our dysfunctional unwritten constitution. The likelihood of either of these institutions delivering any form of levelling up is mere fiction for little people.